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Post by Deleted on Feb 21, 2016 19:35:03 GMT
When shuffling along a row to your seat, thou shalt not whack the heads of the people in the row in front with your bag/coat.
And stop gargling phlegm like that, it's barely acceptable in the privacy of your own home let alone the theatre!
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858 posts
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Post by duncan on Feb 21, 2016 20:00:01 GMT
From a slightly different perspective - theaters should not be allowed any seating that is not clearly signposted as being (for example A32 or G43 or M88) or whatever. Tiny little bits of metal attached to the floor that can only be seen by an owl are of no use when your audience is made up of myopic people with arthritis in the knee.
Make it easier for people to actually find the seat they have paid for and everyone will benefit, how many times do I have to go through the "excuse me you are in my seat" routine because the row and/or seat numbers are virtually impossible to read. At a show last week and seat number 43 was that worn that the number looked more like 13 and thus caused confusion for virtually everyone on the row as it was placed at the entrance to the row.
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Post by joem on Feb 21, 2016 20:11:57 GMT
Quasi-mandatory standing ovations for practically every show where the cast has got through without too many obvious mistakes.
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Post by theglenbucklaird on Feb 21, 2016 22:55:24 GMT
No children. At anything. Ever. Including children's shows. I'd already pressed like your comment, but... then I realised you were just talking about theatre shows. I thought it was a life comment |
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171 posts
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Post by moelhywel on Feb 21, 2016 23:36:58 GMT
Women with long hair worn on top of their head in a 'bun'. Do they not realise how much it will obscure the view for the people sitting behind them.
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Post by d'James on Feb 21, 2016 23:39:01 GMT
Women with long hair worn on top of their head in a 'bun'. Do they not realise how much it will obscure the view for the people sitting behind them. ( . . . and it looks hideous!) |
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Post by showgirl on Feb 22, 2016 4:53:35 GMT
I don't think "updos" are hideous; it depends entirely on the overall look, but I agree that they are inappropriate at the theatre.
What I find hard to cope with is really powerful "perfume" (though the types I've encountered smell more like a heavy-duty cleaning product or even industrial chemical). Some people genuinely experience a bad physical reaction to these but at best they are unpleasant for everyone else. What's more, it always seems to happen at a packed-out show when there is no opportunity to move.
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157 posts
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Post by PhantomNcl on Feb 22, 2016 10:48:22 GMT
Should have: electrodes built into every seat, controlled by ushers from a desk at the rear of the auditorium.
Woman in P22 is taking photos. Zap.
Man in F12 checking Facebook. Zap.
Drunken hen party along N row think it's a singalong. Zap, zappity zap zap.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 22, 2016 13:02:04 GMT
What about when the ushers can't behave? I complained years ago about ushers who were talking at the back of the circle, clearly audible to the audience, and was then given comps for another show in the same group. (Omega. Anyone remember them.)
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641 posts
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Post by jaqs on Feb 22, 2016 14:06:10 GMT
Should have: electrodes built into every seat, controlled by ushers from a desk at the rear of the auditorium. Woman in P22 is taking photos. Zap. Man in F12 checking Facebook. Zap. Drunken hen party along N row think it's a singalong. Zap, zappity zap zap. I think a tranquilizer/stun gun/evapporator should be issued to everyone on this board upon membership. We'll soon end the bad behaviour and between us we see almost everything. That way we can also zap the noisy ushers. |
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Post by Flim Flam on Feb 22, 2016 14:39:03 GMT
Should have: electrodes built into every seat, controlled by ushers from a desk at the rear of the auditorium. Woman in P22 is taking photos. Zap. Man in F12 checking Facebook. Zap. Drunken hen party along N row think it's a singalong. Zap, zappity zap zap. I think a tranquilizer/stun gun/evapporator should be issued to everyone on this board upon membership. We'll soon end the bad behaviour and between us we see almost everything. That way we can also zap the noisy ushers. Can we get capes? You know, like proper superheroes? |
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Post by DebbieDoesDouglas(Hodge) on Feb 22, 2016 14:50:34 GMT
Groups of teenage girls who go and see anything with sex involved
The last 20mins of Cleansed where almost spoiled by a group who found anything sexual or with nudity in ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS!
It was like 'dudes, she's being raped!' Not cool
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Post by Dave25 on Feb 22, 2016 15:08:32 GMT
It shouldn't be permitted to sell auditorium-inappropriate food. Nothing that stinks, nothing that rustles, nothing that crunches, nothing that leaves a mess all over the floor. (I can't help wondering if the idea of selling popcorn in cinemas came from someone who owned a carpet-cleaning service.) Crisps are right out. Also, drinks should come without ice, partly to prevent the noise of clattering ice cubes and partly because people are buying a drink, not a tub of solid water with bits of drink lurking in the gaps. Food and drinks should not be permitted at all in an auditorium. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 22, 2016 15:45:13 GMT
Drinks can be allowed in, but only in plastic cups, and never with ice. Preferably in small quantities too - it's useful to be able to stave off a cough, but you don't want to be the idiot tromping noisily out of the auditorium ten minutes before the interval.
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Post by schuttep on Feb 22, 2016 17:43:25 GMT
Finishing your ice-cream tub during the second act and scraping...every...single...last...drop...from...the...bottom...of...the...tub.
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Post by Polly1 on Feb 22, 2016 17:46:36 GMT
Finishing your ice-cream tub during the second act and scraping...every...single...last...drop...from...the...bottom...of...the...tub. That. My personal bugbear too. |
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Post by infofreako on Feb 22, 2016 17:59:03 GMT
I hate the ice cream tub thing. If I ever have ice cream I make damned sure its gone by curtain up
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Post by Michael on Feb 22, 2016 18:02:30 GMT
If I ever bought ice cream in the interval (which I never will given the ridiculous prices for such a small tub), it'd never last that long anyway.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 22, 2016 18:35:29 GMT
Finishing your ice-cream tub during the second act and scraping...every...single...last...drop...from...the...bottom...of...the...tub. And then... sticking the empty tub... (except it's not empty because the full contents can't be scraped out with a square plastic "spoon")... under the seat in front... which is where I put my coat and bag... and then you bugger off quick... before I can reach for my coat... and find it's covered in melted strawberry ice-cream. (Mary Poppins experience at the Prince Edward.) |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 22, 2016 21:50:33 GMT
In addition to headbobbing, of course you can have a good gander at the girls (or guys) in short skirts or tight outfits but don't spend the whole freaking show eyeing up the performers. Or at least try and be subtle about it.
There was an audible disheartened sigh when the girl the man beside me was staring at did a cartwheel and he discovered she was wearing some shorts underneath her dress.
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Post by Peach on Feb 22, 2016 22:48:05 GMT
Who are these people that can make their ice cream last into the second act?
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Post by Peach on Feb 22, 2016 22:50:52 GMT
Personally, I would only allow people that have their coat/bag game sorted into theatres so you don't have to wait while they gather up their belongings when you need to get past.
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Post by 49thand8th on Feb 22, 2016 23:42:00 GMT
Who are these people that can make their ice cream last into the second act? Ew. At that point it's a milkshake. |
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Post by DuchessConstance on Feb 23, 2016 0:05:26 GMT
At the WOS Awards I was sitting next to someone who had apparently bathed in Angel perfume. I thought for a second I'd fallen through a time portal to 1993 and Kiss of the Spider Woman was about to clean up.
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Post by vickster51 on Feb 23, 2016 12:17:46 GMT
If you have a cough when you come to the theatre, for god's sake bring a bottle of water with you! I always have one just in case, but the amount of coughers who don't drives me mad!
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